They say that a lot of people need to hit rock bottom before they find it in them to start the process of crawling back up. My rock bottom hit in the midst of COVID, finding out that I wasn’t taking care of myself and my autoimmune disorder properly, causing it to attack not just my blood and my joints, but also my kidneys.
Figuring out what treatment was needed for my new condition required a kidney biopsy which caused a bleed and required a subsequent emergency surgery to stop it. All the while, I was screaming in pain as my blood filled up my kidney to the point of near explosion.
You would think that this was my rock bottom…but shortly afterward, we found out that I had to do the most severe treatment option (strong immunotherapy) for my disorder. This made me not just immunocompromised but also extremely immunosuppressed during a pandemic at a time when the vaccines were still just a promise.
You would think that this was my rock bottom, but after 6 rounds of chemo, the results were not good. The treatment was not working for me. Amid threats of kidney failure and the possibility of a transplant, we started a new treatment. The positivity that I sustained during the 6 months of the first treatment was really waning by then. Fear and anxiety were sinking in and threatening to overwhelm me.
I’ve always known that stress was a trigger for me and my autoimmune disease. I was diagnosed with SLE (lupus) after three of years of practicing Matrimonial Law in Hong Kong. I was told to relax and lay off the stress. Luckily, in my third year of practice, I had already started my Masters in Counselling, going back to my psychology roots from my undergraduate days. After my diagnosis, I quit my job and took some time off to adjust, but was still able to complete my practicum and start working at a counselling center in 2015.
Counselling was a such a breath of fresh air for me. I was able to help people in a much more meaningful way.
Life was smooth sailing for a little while, but like most of the world, Covid was very difficult for us. We had moved to a new country just one month before the first case in the world was reported, we moved for my husband’s new job and it was in the travel business, I was trying to set up my own counselling practice and private company and we were also trying to start a family.
I was trying to do too much and I didn’t make time for myself to relax and decompress. I was constantly anxious about something and there was so much to be anxious about during that time! My body had to give me a sign to slow down since I wasn’t listening. That’s when my lupus started to attack my kidneys.
In the process of crawling back up, one may go around seeking different remedies, they might find a new religion, read lots of self-help books, find a therapist, coach, mentor or guru. Basically find new ways to transform in whatever way they can to find the inner strength and bravery to face life again. To see the light at the end of the tunnel.
For me, this came in the form of one of my dear friends who reached out to me in support and offered free meditation coaching to me as part of her certification program. I jumped at the chance, but I warned her that I’ve tried meditation before, and it was obviously not for me as it never works! I can never sit still long enough or find that elusive “stillness”.
At that point though, what did I have to lose? I might as well try as many other alternatives as I can. Western medicine on its own was not cutting it for me.
Through the help of my friend, not only did I start a steady meditation practice, but I branched out and also started a qigong energy practice, sound healing, reiki attunements and discovered my love for plants and crystals. These are embedded in my life now and I won’t function well without them!
My health was improving. I found a whole new world of healing methods so that I didn’t have to rely solely on Western medicine. It wasn’t just about taking certain medication, supplements, or herbs to control my symptoms anymore. I was starting to learn more about the connection between our emotions, thoughts and our energetic and physical bodies.
After this second health scare, I wanted to incorporate all this new learning and understanding into my counselling and coaching practice as well. I trained in ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) to help clients “drop the struggle” and make space for themselves and stillness. I also started to incorporate more mindfulness, family systems theory and self-discovery in my couples work.
Hypnotherapy was something that has always interested me, but I never knew where to start. It was by chance one day when my singing bowl teacher told us that she took her son to see a hypnotherapist for a leg wound and it really helped heal him. She mentioned QHHT so I read a few of Dolores Cannon’s books and I was hooked! I felt like I finally found what it was that I was looking for. The method that can help everyone, no matter what is troubling them – physical, emotional, relational, motivational or spiritual.
During a QHHT session, clients are regressed to past lives or even to other dimensions or planets. They may also be regressed back to certain events in this current life that have been repressed. We bypass the chatter of the conscious mind to get in touch with the inner part of themselves, or what Dolores called the Subconscious. This is that part of us that is all knowing and can give us answers and healing. This type of past life regression offers profound information on your past and future selves to help you align and discover your soul's purpose. This really resonated with me and the journey that I had been on.
As I recovered from my recent flare, I also gave myself a break from my business so that I can focus on my health. I called this my “hungry caterpillar phase” as I explored all these different healing modalities that were new to me.
This sounds simple, but it took a lot for me to turn off my beliefs and patterns so that I can comfortably, without guilt or beating myself up, give time to myself. Even during my chemo treatments, I continued to see clients!
I know that a lot of people are like me – not stopping for a breath before they go onto the next thing. Hitting the ground running even when they are out of fuel. Attaching their self-worth to their achievements.
I hope that through my work now, clients are able to open up to me and we can discover some answers and breakthroughs together. I hope my clients are able to find clarity about their current lives, their struggles and the lessons they are here to learn. And I hope that they don’t have to hit their rock-bottom before setting out to make a change in their lives.
Education & Training
QHHT Practitioner Level 1 Intern
Currently undergoing QHHT Level 2 training
Masters in Counselling (Monash University)
Gottman Levels 1 and 2 (Couples work)
Emotion Focused Couples Therapy Externship Completion
Gottman Certified Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work Leader
Gottman Certified Bringing Baby Home Educator
Certified SYMBIS Assessment facilitator (pre-marital counselling)
ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) Certification with Russ Harris
Sound Healing Levels 1, 2, and 3 (the Singing Bowl Gallery)
Reiki 1 and 2 Attunements
Qigong Certified Instructor-in-training (Yoqi)